A SOCCER SPORTSCASTER'S COMMENTARY

 A SOCCER SPORTSCASTER’S COMMENTARY

 

“Good evening, folks! We have a stimulating atmosphere here at Brew’s Oasis Coffee Shop Stadium. We are witnessing an unanticipated skirmish between Team Dino and Team Jessica, and oh boy, it’s a blazing clash!”

 

“Let’s pick up the action live… Dino steps up, looking unruffled but under strain. He opens with an unsettling statement. “Jessica, I’ve had it.” Oh, that’s a daring move right there. He’s breaking up with her bang in the middle of the crowded café. Perilous strategy, Roy, let’s see if he pulls it off.”

 

“Jessica, however, is not taking this sitting down. She launches a counterattack, questioning Dino’s capability, honesty, and integrity. She’s been coached well by her coach, who came out of retirement to formulate her team’s gameplan.”You’re serious! Right here? In a coffee shop?” A splendid rhetoric strike from Jessica.”

 

“Dino attempts to regain control, going for the definitive defensive tactic. “It’s not you; it’s me deciding.” But let’s be clear, folks, we have seen this play countless times. It’s a drag, a cliché, and it’s anticipated. She intercepts with an emotionally charged challenge, “Is there someone else? Just tell me!”. What a line…now, that’s going to be our hook line for the showreel of this show. Watch the highlights of this show, folks.”

 

“And wait, Jessica has flipped her top! She grabs the coffee mug and oh my word- and smashes it against the wall! That’s an apparent red card offence in any league! “

 

“What say, Roy? We’ve seen many red card offences in the past. It’s the same story. The fuming, nagging, abusing, and violent play that always ruffles the feathers of the opposition.”

 

“The barista, Jenny, steps in as a referee, trying to keep the peace and manage frayed tempers. She issues a stern warning. “Hey! Watch the walls! Oh! She’s not afraid to implement the rules here. A stickler for rules, a referee of international repute, that’s our Jenny.”

 

“Jessica is angry and storms out of the venue. Her exit is like a walk-off goal, though we suspect her volatile behaviour is a self-goal, and she’s not returning for the extra-time playoffs. Meanwhile, looking shaken, Dino offers to pay for the damages. It’s a feeble apology, but at least he’s trying to make amends. A gentleman of a player is Dino.”

 

“Jenny, our reliable referee, doesn’t let him off the hook easily. “Next time, try the park!” she declares. And she’s right. It would be a free show and unlimited entertainment for the entire unpaying, abusive, manipulative crowd, who like to live rent-free in your head.”

 

“As the dust settles, we contemplate a truly memorable scene here at Brew Oasis. A clash of emotions, a shattered mug, and an upright barista who deserves a medal for trying to rein in the game. And the lesson here, Roy, is that breakups should be clean and swift, sans the drama. Because once the coffee mug is smashed, there’s no going back!”.

 

“That’s all from my fellow commentator Roy and me on love’s unpredictable pitch. Back to you in the studios.”

 

 

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